'I know you only invited me in for a coffee, but' was commended in the 2018 National Poetry Competition.

From the judges: "I loved this poem straight away and found myself laughing out loud at its sarcasm, humour and sharpness. It is melodramatic , whilst disguising its drama with this factual, understated tone, and finishes with a flourish with that wonderfully dismissive last line." - Kim Moore

I know you only invited me in for a coffee, but

by Natalie Shaw

I have eaten your house
Our children were playing inside

I say playing – actually your child
Was ignoring my child in a meanish, unkind sort of way

Anyway I have eaten them now
So it is irrelevant that your child is not a kind person

I ate your 4×4 too
Even though I cannot drive

I am better than M. Mangetout –
Rather than getting to work on, say, a hubcap

I just swallow these things whole.
How will you drive the streets of Dartmouth Park now?

I am breathing fire and a bit too busy to help.

The Poetry Society was founded in 1909 to promote “a more general recognition and appreciation of poetry”.  Since then, it has grown into one of Britain’s most dynamic arts organisations, representing British poetry both nationally and internationally.  Today it has more than 4000 members worldwide and publishes The Poetry Review.

With innovative education and commissioning programmes and a packed calendar of performances, readings and competitions, The Poetry Society champions poetry for all ages.

More about the Poetry Society…

Tweets @PoetrySociety

'If you want to engage the brain, you can’t just sit there gazing at the wall, gazing at the TV screen and expect your mind to be active. Its active engagement and poetry is a fun way of doing that but nobody said it isn’t challenging' @GylesB1 carehome.co.uk/news/article.c…

Love this via @PoetrySociety cafe Sharing carefully crafted words #poems #poetry Retweeted by The Poetry Society

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Sharing carefully crafted words 
#poems
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"When citizens are voting based not on facts, but on political narratives, we need poets to talk about climate change." Ahead of tomorrow's #climatestrike, #SLAMbassador Matt Sowerby writes about poetry and climate change: bit.ly/climatepoetry1 Are you joining #WeekForFuture? Retweeted by The Poetry Society

Hello gorgeous poets. I’d love to have an involved conversation with you about your poetry in November 💛 twitter.com/PoetrySociety/… Retweeted by The Poetry Society

Two innovative new vending machines were launched at the University of Lincoln this week, but instead of the usual chocolate and crisps it will dispense poetry. The machines aim to make literature more accessible in public places. thelincolnite.co.uk/2019/09/introd…

Birmingham (UK)! @rozgoddard will see you now! Feedback on your #poems, 1-hour sessions at Birmingham Buddhist Centre B13. SAT 2 NOVEMBER poetrysociety.org.uk/event/roznov20… @WhatsOnBMail @BhamWaterstones @PoetryBrum @unibirmingham

test Twitter Media - Birmingham (UK)! @rozgoddard will see you now! 

Feedback on your #poems, 1-hour sessions at Birmingham Buddhist Centre B13.  

SAT 2 NOVEMBER 

https://t.co/Bj1DYVqtWl

@WhatsOnBMail @BhamWaterstones @PoetryBrum @unibirmingham https://t.co/bfnYrCnQmi
test Twitter Media - Birmingham (UK)! @rozgoddard will see you now! 

Feedback on your #poems, 1-hour sessions at Birmingham Buddhist Centre B13.  

SAT 2 NOVEMBER 

https://t.co/Bj1DYVqtWl

@WhatsOnBMail @BhamWaterstones @PoetryBrum @unibirmingham https://t.co/bfnYrCnQmi
test Twitter Media - Birmingham (UK)! @rozgoddard will see you now! 

Feedback on your #poems, 1-hour sessions at Birmingham Buddhist Centre B13.  

SAT 2 NOVEMBER 

https://t.co/Bj1DYVqtWl

@WhatsOnBMail @BhamWaterstones @PoetryBrum @unibirmingham https://t.co/bfnYrCnQmi

We recorded a podcast with Alyson Hallet 5 years ago. scottishpoetrylibrary.org.uk/podcast/lynn-d… twitter.com/PoetrySociety/… Retweeted by The Poetry Society

London! I’ll be reading in the @PoetrySociety cafe on Monday at 7pm as part of this poetry pamphlet launch party. It’s up there with the time I celebrated my birthday in Dundonald Ice Bowl in 1991 in a red leather jacket. Can’t wait to hear these guys. twitter.com/TheEmmaPress/s… Retweeted by The Poetry Society

This is a wonderful opportunity to get feedback on your poems-in-progress on a 1-1 basis with poet & tutor @alysonhallett1 **1 slot left!** ✍️📚 #amwriting Bath, SAT 28 SEP poetrysociety.org.uk/event/alysonse… @BathSpaPoetry @BathSpaUni @UniofBath @BathCollege @bathlive

test Twitter Media - This is a wonderful opportunity to get feedback on your poems-in-progress on a 1-1 basis with poet & tutor @alysonhallett1   **1 slot left!** ✍️📚 #amwriting 

Bath, SAT 28 SEP 

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@BathSpaPoetry
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@BathCollege
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It's that time of year again... apply now to join our 2020 Traineeship programme! We are looking for two Collections Trainees and one Education Trainee to join our team in January 2020. wordsworth.org.uk/traineeships/ #museumjobs #museumtraineeships #nongraduateswelcome Retweeted by The Poetry Society